As an expat in BA, it is vital to understand that Porteños (BA local citizens) have their own cultural rules on how to express their emotions, build relationships and communicate effectively with others. Are they better or worse rules than yours? Obviously not.
However, failing to become culturally aware of these differences may take you down the wrong path of interpretation.
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Your plane just landed in BA city. You are coming to visit your good old Argentinian friend. You haven´t seen her for several years and you know she will be waiting for you in the Airport.
As soon as you step off “Aduana” (Customs), there she is: big smile, jumping, waiving hands and shouting your name effusively as if she was completely alone in the whole airport. This makes you feel a bit embarassed. When you finally approach her, she throws her arms around your neck and holds you tight. To your surprise, she suddenly begins to shed tears of joy. She cries and tells you how much she missed you.
You are really happy to see her too, but… isn´t she overreacting? Would you response to your friend´s emotions in a similar way?
No right or wrong answer.
Fons Trompenaars, the author of the Bestseller book “Riding the waves of culture”, states that reason and emotion influence relationships between people. Based on Parson´s research, Trompenaars describes a variety of orientations regarding the way people across cultures relate to others. One of them is the neutral vs emotional orientation.
Sounds too obvious? Let´s get into the details.
When we interact with others, is it acceptable to express our emotions openly? Or should we keep our feelings for ourselves?
Believe it or not, affectivity is usually the result of convention. Anger, joy, sadness or surprise are not equally exhibited in all cultures (neither in the same degree nor in the same way). Personal space, body language, gestures and tone of voice are also culturally determined.
Unlike Anglo-saxon and some North European countries, Argentina is an emotional oriented culture. This means that Argentines have a tendency to reveal thoughts and feelings in public, both through verbal and body language. Argentines will usually let their emotions flow easily through touching, a rather loud tone of voice, laughter and facial expressions, to name a few. Soccer fans will scare you off with their highly emotional shouting of “Goooooool” every time their favourite soccer team marks a goal. And don´t get surprised if Argentine mums kiss their children in public, or raise their tone of voice unexpectedly to shout at them in the bus when the little ones are not behaving properly.
On the other hand, neutral cultures (such as Japanese, UK or Norweigan) tend to reveal their emotions quite rarely. They usually prefer to leave affectivity outside of interpersonal relations, as they consider that intensive emotional exhibitions should be controlled.
It is important to note that this is not stereotyping. Trompenaars theory is based on extensive research and it does not indicate that all people from one culture will react equally. The main point is that cultural orientations show us degrees of likelihood. This means that, in given circumstances, individuals from one culture will tend to behave under certain cultural norms, in comparison to individuals from other cultures in similar circumstances.
Why is cultural awareness important?
So at this stage, you understand that there are emotional and neutral oriented cultures. And you can tell that Argentina is closer to the affective ones. Perfect. So next question is: Why would an expat need to explore their own emotional reactions when encountering with Argentines?
Trompenaars gives us a a good reason for this.
When we express ourselves, we usually expect confirmation of our feelings and thoughts in the response of others. In other words, if my approach is highly emotional, I will probably seek a direct, emotional response in return. However, if I prefer to keep my emotions under control, I will expect a neutral, controlled response as well.
When I interact with a person who doesn´t abide by my cultural norms, things can get difficult.
At this point, can you imagine the cross-cultural misunderstandings that can take place when neutral and emotional oriented individuals meet?
Here are a couple of everyday examples:
If you are an expat coming from a neutral culture, you may interpret ups and downs in speech of Argentines and constant interruptions as an indicator of lack of seriousness or professionalism.
Did you ever wonder what leads Argentines to exhibit this voice pattern? They often show their deep involvement and interest in the conversation by raising or changing their tone of voice. In many Latin American cultures, interrupting their counterparts before he/she finished talking is a signal of interest in what is being said. Furthermore, silence could be interpreted as a failure in communication.
Another one: as a neutral oriented individual, you may feel that your personal space is threatened if you just meet an Argentine stranger (usually female) who attempts to kiss you on the cheek in a social event. Hey, don´t get annoyed so easily. Your Argentine´s stranger is just doing what is socially expected for a first encounter: being polite.
If she is not culturally aware of your neutral orientation and if you fail to emulate her behaviour, she may interpret your detached demeanor as dislike or disdain. Not a good start, right?
A good piece of advice for neutral oriented individuals is to learn to tolerate Argentines´ emotionality without feeling intimidated. It´s not personal!
As an expat in BA, it is vital to understand that Porteños have their own cultural rules on how to build relationships and communicate effectively with others. Are they better or worse rules than yours? Obviously not.
However, failing to become culturally aware of these differences may take you down the wrong path of interpretation.
Keep an eye on this blog for more intercultural articles to make the most of your expat experience in BA!
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Are you a NewComer in Buenos Aires? Would you like to understand the Argentinian way, from the perspective of an Argentinian Cultural Specialist, while meeting new people in a friendly environment?
Then join us in our Nomadas Globales - NEW Intercultural Coffee Meetings!
For expats, international students, travelers and all those interested in understanding Argentine locals idiosyncracy.
Agenda: "How to communicate effectively with Argentine locals?" (Jan 13th) Dissertation & Round Table of Natalia Sarro, Argentinian Psychologist and Intercultural Trainer. Followed by open discussion.
When? January 13th 2010 - 5.00pm
Where? Gran Café Tortoni. Avenida de Mayo 825. Capital (BA)
How long? 90 minutes.
Cost: 20 Ar$ (promotional price)
Last seats available. Pre-booking required.
New meetings will be scheduled soon. Check our website or contact us for more details: nomadasglobales@gmail.com
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Pictures used in this article belong to:
http://marketingfromtheheart.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/marketing-emotion.jpg
http://imagenesargentinas.blogspot.com/
1 comentario:
Hello Natalia, as I said to you before, I loved to read this article "The Emotional Argentines"; why? because it was both interesting and true.
I am not exactly sure if I am right in what I am about to say, but I believe that among all the Latin American countries, Argentina has the most overly emotional kind of people. What a blessing to be able to show so freely how we feel, to express our own emotions without feeling shameful about it. I am not talking about showing emotions when we are alone or hiding in a corner of a room, but when we are in a party, or in a meeting, or like you said waiting for a loved one at an airport, and then letting all those emotions run free, and so we hug, and kiss, and hug, and kiss again and again, because we are demonstrating our internal deep feelings for the other person; and we do not care who may be around us, or watching us, that is not important at that time. On the other hand, other people are really not surprised because they act in the same way, so what we do is no attention grabber.
However, if we were doing the same thing (hugging and kissing)in public, in a more impersonal cultural environment, then we would most definitely be the center of attention.
Now, are we "Argentines" better than others around the world, who do not behave in exactly the same way we do? Of course not, we only prove that we are different in how we conduct our daily lives, no better or worse.
There are lots of people who read lots of books about inter-cultural differences and so on, and they are somehow informed intellectually, but nothing compares to actually living and sharing day by day with people from a different cultural background. It is a night and day kind of experience, and a very enriching one. I can speak from past experiences, and you too Natalia can express the same sentiments having lived overseas for a time. It is amazing how our minds expand, and as you learn from others and adapt, you slowly begin to see the world from a different perspective and a new set of glasses; understanding people easier and better.
Therefore, I believe there is no right or wrong answer to the cultural enigma, but "Variety mixed with a bit of eccentricity" that makes every culture unique and enchanting.
Alejandro Tornato
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